Celebrating Life and Honoring Love: A Tribute to My Cousin, Aunt, and Uncle

This past week my family was hit with another loss.  

My cousin, James Jr., just 37 years old, passed away suddenly.  Writing this isn’t about grief alone, but about celebrating life and honoring love—lifting up his memory and honoring the parents who raised him, my Aunt Ressa and Uncle James.

James Jr. was bold, loyal, and deeply rooted in who he was.  He loved his family, his city of Dallas (Oak Cliff), and his alma maters, SOC and TSU.  He was brilliant, holding a master’s degree, and yet always proudly “hood.”  What he loved most, though, was being a father.  His five-year-old daughter, Kamryn, was his heart. His life and legacy remind me of the importance of celebrating life and honoring love.

When I think of my Aunt Ressa, my heart softens.  As a little girl, I adored her.  She let me “drive” her sky-blue Nissan when I was barely 9; allowing me to shift the gears as she smiled sweetly.  She was beautiful, with her big 80s bangs and pink eyeshadow, and she was patient beyond measure.  To this day, she never seems rattled by a house full of children.  She has taught me the patience and joy that comes with truly honoring love in action.

As an adult, I’ve leaned on her even more.  She cared for my son during his first two years, later for my daughter, and she always ensured my babies felt loved and safe. In her home, my son and her grandson became inseparable, and their bond still inspires me to this day.  If you don’t love me they way those two love each other, I don’t want it.

My family has faced so much loss in just two years—my Pops, my uncle, my grandmother, my great-uncle, and now James Jr.  And yet, somehow, these moments of heartbreak have pulled us closer together.  They remind me that life is too short to hold on to bitterness or regret.

What I want my Aunt Ressa and Uncle James—and anyone walking through grief—to know is this:  you don’t have to hide the hard and the hurt.  You can scream, say no to company, or simply be.  But also know that love is what carries us forward.  James Jr. lives on in all of us through his love, his joy, and his boldness. This is what it means to celebrate life and honor love.

Death reminds us that tomorrow isn’t promised.  So let’s love hard today.  Not in fear, not in shame, but in joy.  Let’s cherish each second with our people, because love cures all.

BTW:  “Those who are loved are never lost” – African Proverb

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