How Does Your Hair Make You Feel?

Currently, my hair is giving passion for life cutie.  I’m  giving you spring into springtime with a twist!

My hair on a daily.

Unless my cousin, Narissa, twists my hair or I get braids by Debane, I wear it afroed, wild and free.  Maybe a wig here and there, if it’s not too hot.  I believe your hair should make you feel empowered.  In turn, this allows you to feel “pretty”; whatever that may look like to, and for you.  There is really only one judge.  I am in a season of reclaiming my power and coming back to me. Therefore, that means either natural or a lightweight protective style.

Representation matters.

As a child, I played salon with my dolls: flat iron, curling iron, basic pin ups.  Somewhere, I lost those skills.  I cannot braid or style my own hair (hence the afro wild and free), let alone someone else’s hair. The worry, when I found out I was having a little girl. I feared being able to manage and maintain her “crown and glory,” (not just in style, but health), with my limited hairdresser skills.

Growing up, the standard of hair beauty was long, straight, and flowing. A tighter and kinkier texture like mine was not highly represented, nor praised. As a black female, whether our hair grew out of the scalp that way, or not, there was the undertone that we must assimilate.  Admittedly, as a child, there were times I thought, “if only my hair were more straight and silky, I would be “prettier.”  Thank God this feeling is far removed.  I can only hope it is a feeling/thought my daughter never has.

My natural journey.

I went natural about 15 years ago, never doing the big chop, just trimming the perm off a little at a time, ( had to be able to pull it up in a bun; my go-to).  My grandmother, mother, and just about all my aunts had already started their natural process. I was now working with two self-assured natural sistas (hey Chema & Crystal), and not to mention, I was over having to dodge my warm steam showers. Collectively, they had given me a dose of courage.  Thus, my natural journey began.

I must confess, it took a quick minute to adjust to seeing myself with my natural texture; having been permed for so long.  What did my hair look or feel like in its unpermed state?  What would it take to maintain it?  (A cabinet full of partially used products I finally threw away, apparently). I will say, the transitional period was a rough process.

There were not many products at that time, for natural hair.  Thankfully, times have changed.  Now, there is an overwhelming amount of products available.  However, I do appreciate the increased representation and inclusion of the entire african diaspora and our different textures of hair.

Love your hair.

With the help of Youtube, and a willing young neighbor from time to time, I allow my daughter, the fashionista diva, to express herself through her hair.  We are able to find kid styles that she likes, and I can accomplish.  When she looks in the mirror, I ask her, “do you feel confident and ready to take on the day?”  I am trying to instill in her that each strain was placed perfectly at her creation.  It is important to me that she loves her natural self and that she remembers it’s just hair, so have fun! Her eager response, “YES!” and subsequential strutting and tossing, lets me know she is feeling herself, AS SHE SHOULD!!! (I always feel quite accomplished when I complete a style and she approves!)

The styles of AD.

Over the course of my life, my hairstyles have included braids, weave (I tried it), blonde, shaved (twice), purple, perm, and even a curl (easy on the Jeri.)  I believe, you do what you want to do with your hair. As for me, going natural has created versatility, freedom, and liberation.  I enjoy seeing women with their expressions: permed, natural, wigs, weave, cut, long, and everything in between.  It is both reassuring and inspiring.

My hair journey has helped me to better love myself, especially once I accepted she has a mind of her own. I strive to create a space for both myself and my daughter to innately embrace our natural selves above all, but have fun with it, and don’t let it define us – hair today, gone tomorrow.

Four Empowering Books Approved by Aliah

1. Hair Love by Matthew A. Cherry
2. Don’t Touch My Hair by Sharee Miller
3. I Am Enough by Grace Byers
4. When God Made You by Matthew Paul Turner

BTW: Good hair is healthy hair. Thank you Celisa for keeping it in good trim.

How does your hair make you feel? What does your mane say about you? What is your go to style? Tell us about your hair horror story, we’ve all got them.

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